I looked out my friend's window while her 12-year-old daughter chopped wood in the backyard. I didn't know what was more surprising, that he was helping without being asked or that my friend was allowing her son to use an ax, seemingly without undue anxiety on her part. He entered the house, taking off his boots and gloves before putting some logs in the wood stove. Why was her child taking on such adult tasks when I could barely ask mine to clean their rooms? “She must need help,” my own father responded casually when I described the scene to him later that evening. I needed help too, I decided, and I had to figure out how to get it. It's easy for household chores to fall by the wayside on our to-do lists as everything from homework to swim team to piano lessons compete for our family's limited time. However, even if we think it will be harder to get the child to do the housework than to do it ourselves, housework can be just as beneficial as any extracurricular activity for social and emotional growth. of our children. Experts agree that household chores can give children confidence and self-discipline, encouraging them to see themselves as an indispensable part of the family. Fortunately, even a two or three year old can tackle simple tasks. After many years and careful study, I now have a teenager who often takes out the trash without being asked and a four year old who is almost solely responsible for cleaning up. our cat’s diet. Here are some tips that I have found helpful along the way: 1) Give your child choices. Children like to feel like they have a choice. If they are able to choose from a variety of tasks, they are more likely to complete them happily. A child may prefer to empty the middle of the paper... to complete your tasks, you can play Minecraft or watch TV. “As soon as you finish your chores, we can go see your friends.” “As soon as your chores are done, I’ll be ready to start baking those cookies we were talking about.” Using "as soon as" puts the responsibility for household chores in the child's control, even if it makes them understand that mom or dad is running the show. In these scenarios, the parent doesn't really care whether or not the child can watch TV or eat cookies. If the child wants to play Minecraft, she will have her bed made. If he wants to go see his friends, he will vacuum the living room. And if this is not the case, the child knows that the fault lies with him alone. Whether your kids are toddlers or teens, these little tips can help turn household chores from a battlefield into a regularly scheduled part of the day..