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Essay / Cancer Specific Relationship in “To Cancer-with Love – My Journey of Joy” by Neelam Kumar
Close interpersonal relationships play a major role in effective cancer management. Neelam Kumar's husband died when she was in her 30s and hence could not be a part of her cancer journey. There is a common element of guilt felt by the other two authors, in which Paul's wife Lucy and Anup's wife Amrita had to take on responsibilities in addition to caring for their husbands. Paul and Anup seem to have felt a sense of regret at not being able to be the husbands they aspired to be. Say no to plagiarism. Get a tailor-made essay on “Why Violent Video Games Should Not Be Banned”?Get the original essay The process of rejecting the aspirations and dreams that Paul had set for himself and his wife was not easy. He feels guilty for not being the person Lucy fell in love with. He expresses his insecurities by commenting on the presence of acne on his face and how Lucy liked his smooth skin. Paul struggled to recapture even a tiny part of who he was, to be a good husband, a man who loved to ride his bike, run half-marathons, and throw up his laughing niece in the air. He expresses how Lucy had become a pillar to him, literally. The relationship appears to have taken on an unbalanced nature for Paul, where he felt unable to help. Paul talks more openly about his ups and downs with Lucy. Towards the end of his residency, he had begun to suspect that something was wrong with his body, but saying the "C" word out loud was dreaded. His conflicted mindset took a toll on their marriage – even though the possibility of cancer was too excruciating. The distance between him and Lucy only disappeared once the diagnosis was clear. In a way, cancer saved their marriage. Throughout the illness, the couple faced a number of dilemmas: how long the illness would last, how serious it would be, and what would happen after Paul died. Faced with the crisis, the two men became closer but the nature of the relationship changed radically. Cancer treatment caused weight loss, fatigue, nausea, among other side effects. Anup talks about the family's financial burden and how Amrita had to sell her gold to make ends meet. He uses the metaphor of an ivory tower to express how Amrita had protected him from all the possible stressors and problems they faced. He talks about several occasions when she cheered him up, how she was able to notice him. Keep in mind: this is just a sample. Get a personalized article from our expert writers now. Get a Custom Essay There is a similarity in the way both male authors talk about their spouses. Their ability to notice times when they felt depressed or insecure about their appearance – for Paul, it was his smooth skin that was now covered in acne, and for Anup, it was his fear of going bald. In both scenarios, the authors spoke positively about their spouse. Any marital conflict has been blamed on the situation, but never on the partners' inability to cope..