In The Secret Life of Bees by Sue Monk Kidd, Lily feels lost without a mother to guide her step by step through life. However, with her escape to Tiburon, Lily finally finds support and solace through new experiences and exposures. More specifically, Lily is able to discover an alternative mother figure: nature. Unlike his mother, nature is not an ephemeral presence or a simple memory. Lily finds inner peace and solace in nature, as it is always present and constantly renewing itself, a trait Lily never found in her mother. Say no to plagiarism. Get a tailor-made essay on 'Why Violent Video Games Should Not Be Banned'?Get Original Essay Deborah is absent for most of Lily's life, a fleeting figure. Lily asks T-Ray about her mother and is disappointed: "I managed to get a few scraps of information from him...my mother was buried in Virginia, where her people came from." This pissed me off, thinking I had found a grandmother. No, he told me, my mother was an only child whose mother died four years ago” (13). Lily's grandmother's absence further underscores her mother's absence, since even the closest family ties to Deborah are nonexistent. Lily comments on missing her mother: “The strangest things have made me miss her. Like training bras. Who was I going to ask about this? (13). For a long time, Lily did not have a mother to physically meet her needs and guide her through life. Even small things, like sports bras, remind her every day of her mother's absence. Lily is often confused and uncertain about her mother, always reminded of her own ignorance: "I began to think that perhaps I should find out what I could about my mother... But where should I begin?" The night looked like an ink blot that I had to understand. I sat there and studied the darkness, trying to see through it a sliver of light” (101). Lily's thoughts about her mother are like confused "inkblots"; she is often disturbed by how little she knows and is constantly reminded of the times she never spent with her mother, without ever finding a clue to her mother's true identity. From her days with T-Ray to her days in Tiburon, Lily is always aware of the brevity of Deborah's life. Lily describes her mother's nightmare as a cockroach as follows: "If I told you right now that I never wondered about this dream, that I never closed my eyes and imagined it with cockroach legs... with its worst nature, exposed, I would be... lying down. A cockroach is a creature that no one can love, but you can't kill it. This will go on and on. Just try to get rid of it. (175) Since Lily has been separated from her mother for so long, she feels blind to her mother's true faults. Her doubts and questions “go on and on” and continue to bother her in the back of her mind. Deborah appears as a cockroach, with the identity of a stranger and an unknown pest. Lily examines her mother's photo before her trip to Tiburon: "You couldn't believe the stories I saw in this photo...I put the photo next to my eighth grade photo and looked at all the possible similarities” (13). Lily takes what little information she has about her mother and tries to extract assumptions or images about her mother's personality. She cannot grasp her mother's true personality and is therefore always uncertain and doubtful. Lily's insecurities stem from not completely understanding her mother, just guessing and not.