Kochan's Self-Hate in Confessions of a Mask In his semi-autobiographical novel, Confessions of a Mask, Yukio Mishima examines the struggle for acceptance by a man living outside. socially accepted norms. A motif that strongly permeates this novel is death and the images of blood associated with it. Kochan, a Japanese teenager living in post-war Japan, struggles with his homosexuality and his desire to be "normal." To survive, he must hide behind a mask of decorum. From a young age, Kochan showed signs of attraction to male beauty. His first memory is of a young man from the nocturnal land “with beautiful red cheeks and bright eyes” (8). Initially, her attraction to men is confused with the desire to be like them. When speaking of the young man of the night soil, Kochan remembers thinking, "I want to transform into him." I want to be him” (9). However, as his life continues to unfold, he gradually realizes that his admiration for other men is actually love. When he begins to appreciate male beauty, he develops an affinity for blood and death. This association can ...