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  • Essay / Book Review of “Don’t Say Yes When You Mean No” by Dr. Herbert Fensterheim and Jean Baer

    My book review is of “Don’t Say Yes When You Mean No,” by Dr. Herbert Fensterheim and Jean Baer. In this book, the author bases his arguments on the importance of self-affirmation in achieving one's goals and for personal satisfaction. Rather, the book is a manual that guides the reader in assertiveness techniques so that they can improve various areas of their life such as work, friendships, and relationships. The book also helps to make significant positive changes in one's behavior by employing assertiveness techniques. Say no to plagiarism. Get a tailor-made essay on “Why Violent Video Games Should Not Be Banned”? Get the original essayThesis Statement: “Don’t Say Yes When You Mean No” helps bring about a positive change in a person’s behavior because it discusses various assertiveness techniques that help the reader achieve goals, to defend yourself and change unwanted habits without appearing pushy or aggressive. The book is based on assertiveness training, a specialization of behavior therapy, which aims to help people get back on their feet. for themselves, while maintaining a balance between passivity and aggressiveness. The purpose of the book is to bring a change in the reader's life and help them communicate their thoughts, feelings and needs in a positive way, and bring about changes in their unwanted behavior. models too. The author achieves the goal of the book by giving examples of several visualization techniques, which can then be used in a hierarchical manner so that everyone can come out of their shell and progress. To change behavior, the author focuses on the thoughts or situations that accompany the behavior, then helps the reader control those thoughts and bring about changes in the situation leading to the undesired behavior. Thus, the author achieves the objective of the book, that is, to bring about positive changes in one's behavior through assertiveness training. As mentioned above, the author uses several assertiveness training techniques to bring about changes within the individual himself, which will lead to positive changes in various areas. areas of his life. The author argues that change in behavior patterns can lead to change in thoughts as well as an individual's perception of himself. The author also mentions several times that these behaviors may seem artificial or forced at first, but are essential if change is necessary. Before explaining the different assertiveness techniques, the author asks the reader to recognize what type of assertiveness problems they are currently facing. whether it is an inability to communicate well with others, or a pushover to gain the “respect” of others. Based on this, the reader is invited to think about what kind of changes they would like to make, thereby helping them establish their self-affirmation goals. The author presents several case studies in the book in which he discusses several clients with assertiveness issues. Treatment involves identifying the problem, identifying the cause of the problem, and developing a list of goals to achieve. The different treatment methods used in therapy sessions are role playing, visualization techniques, thought stopping, relaxation techniques and systematic desensitization. Role play: Often, the therapist (the author) engages in role play.